Tag Archives: communication

Clay’s Corner Episode #7: When Your Wife is Amazing

My new Clay’s Corner is a must-watch for married couples (especially husbands) and anyone planning or hoping to get married.

I’m joined by my good friend Josh Canning (Alpha Canada, creator of Canadian Catholic) to talk about our amazing wives – Lisa and Gail.

In particular, we talk about how our wives bring out the best in us, and how they help us and challenge us when we struggle. We also discuss how our wives help us in our journey to become men of God.

15 Things I’ve Learned About Through Marriage

Today, my lovely wife Gail and I celebrate 15 years of marriage as we received the Sacrament of Matrimony on Saturday, July 8, 2000 at St. Paul Parish in Richmond on a beautiful and sunny day.

On our 15th wedding anniversary, here are 15 things I’ve learned about through marriage; they are all essential aspects of our union. This isn’t an exhaustive list, and some of the things might not ring true for other couples.

But these are things that I believe we hold true and dear to our hearts. Some of these things I’ve learned directly from Gail, other things more indirectly. She may have even learned a thing or two from me. And we’ve learned many of these things together as a couple.

Continue reading 15 Things I’ve Learned About Through Marriage

What Youth Ministers Can Learn From a Professional Hockey Team

Source: Canucks.com

What do you get when you combine two of my favourite things (youth ministry and the Vancouver Canucks)?

You get this awesome video:

I was pretty pumped when I saw this video. Most of my friends (and most readers of this blog) know that I’m a passionate Vancouver Canucks fan. I’m blessed to be a season-ticket holder and I’ve made a string of corny music covers and parody videos honouring the team.

Continue reading What Youth Ministers Can Learn From a Professional Hockey Team

Getting on the Same Page: Working With Your Pastor

This past Saturday at our quarterly youth ministry training day, I co-presented a workshop with a good friend of mine Monsignor Gregory Smith.  The topic was working with your pastor.

After sharing some insights after going through four different youth ministry coordinators in the past 4 years, Msgr. Smith outlined five key things he learned during this time:

  1. Trust in the Holy Spirit to provide for our needs
  2. Use the networks you have
  3. Look beyond the diocese
  4. Build relationships quickly
  5. Empower people and use the power you have


I followed up with two pieces of advice as well:

  1. Communication is key
  2. Clarify expectations


With respect to communication, good communication will help to build trust.  As a youth ministry coordinator, it’s vital that you keep your pastor in the loop. It could be via regular face-to-face meetings or periodic written reports.  The important thing is to make the effort even if you feel that it’s not being reciprocated.  Especially when it comes to evaluation: you simply can’t use the excuse of “well I didn’t know that’s what you wanted from me”.  That points to a communication failure; one that you could have avoided.

I firmly believe that having unclear expectations is the biggest source of conflict in ministry, at work, and in family life.  It’s important to clarify expectations regularly with your pastor so you know what he/she wants. After all, you don’t want to waste time and energy working on things that the pastor doesn’t deem important.  Sometimes it may require you to check your ego at the door or to agree to something that you’re not comfortable with.  Often you’ll need to recognize which of your own expectations you’ll need to let go of. After all, you must decrease so that He may increase.